Happy holidays to an incredible team!

"The Bushmen storytellers talk about two kinds of hunger. They say there is a physical hunger, then what they call the Great Hunger, that is the hunger for meaning. There is only one thing that is truly insufferable, and that is life without meaning. There is nothing wrong with the search for happiness. But there is something great--meaning--which transfigures it all. When you have meaning you are content, you belong."
--Sir Laurens van der Post in the documentary Hasten Slowly--

Happy holidays to a team that found meaning in its work and provides meaning thru its work!

Stuck in the hallway

I blog best when I have a glass of wine, so welcome to room 305 of the Hilton Garden Inn in Greenbelt, MD where I've been since Saturday evening. I've used the same issue for 12 mentoring sessions in my Advanced Coach Training and two interviews for our open positions--my lack of work life balance and my fear that I will transfer these crazy behaviors to my life post-EY. A coach today reminded me of the saying, "when one door closes another opens...but it is hell in the hallway."

I've been attending the November meeting of the Conference Board's Executive Coaching Council. Today we had a presentation from two facilitators from Heart Math (www.heartmath.org). Something to think about in the hallway. When was the last time you stepped back and asked yourself, "how crazy is my lifestyle?" We learned some interesting coping mechanisms today but the biggest take-away for me was asking the question, "is this REALLY a threat?" We go into crisis mode and dump noxious chemicals in our bodies when we feel we are threatened. Real threats are related to saber tooth tigers, which our ancestors didn't worry about, by the way, until they smelled them! Some of the "saber tooth tigers" we identified today as a group were:

• email from boss with unreasonable request
• sideways look from a colleague
• flight delay
• missing shirt button
• inability to find document

and my personal favorite

• text from husband saying "don't buy that high-fiber bread again"

Seriously.

So, entertain me--what were your saber tooth tigers this week? Hint: laughter is restorative!

Happy Halloween!

What's the scariest thing you've done in the last month?

Can you guess why this speaks to me?

The Journey

Above the mountains
the geese turn into
the light again

Painting their
black silhouettes
on an open sky.

Sometimes everything
has to be
enscribed across
the heavens

so you can find
the one line
already written
inside you.

Sometimes it takes
a great sky
to find that
small, bright
and indescribable
wedge of freedom
in your own heart.

Sometimes with
the bones of the black
sticks left when the fire
has gone out

someone has written
something new
in the ashes of your life.

You are not leaving
you are arriving.
By David Whyte (www.davidwhyte.com)

ICF conference

I'm at that stage in a conference where the info starts leaking out your ears. Thought I'd better pass some on to you so I can take in more tomorrow. Two great keynotes so far: Michael Gelb--"Think Like Leonardo da Vinci" and Sir Kenneth Robinson- "The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything". Gelb will be a keynote at EY's next ILP event. Very entertaining. My favorite quote from his session was "write drunk; revise sober". So far, I've been to breakouts on branding, coaching "voices", coaching research and intuition. I have handouts (electronically) from several of the sessions and found the info applicable to new partner coaching and the Advanced Coaching Training I will be doing. Happy to talk to you in detail about anything that might catch your interest. Here's some highlights from the session on research, which was led by David Peterson of Google--a cocky, edgy researcher/coach:

Only reliable ROI has to be calibrated at the onset of coaching by asking "what would the value be of your meeting this goal?"

Coaches need to practice "unconditional positive disregard"--i.e. not caring more than their clients about the clients' goals.

What do you think are the most critical elements to successful coaching? Research says: trust, listening, caring, feedback.

Five necessary and sufficient conditions for personal change:

1. Insight--do people understand what is most important to develop?
2. Motivation--are people willing to invest the time and energy to change?
3. Capability--do people have the skills and knowledge to know how to change?
4. Opportunity for real world application--do people have the opportunity to practice the new behaviors in a setting that is real? Note: when role playing and letting a client practice new skills, seek to recreate a real environment. For example, if a person is working on better listening skills, try to stimulate the conditions he would really operate under rather than an artificial environment that anyone could succeed in.
5. Accountability--is anyone paying attention and willing to reward or punish behavior?

Some interesting insights about feedback:

• Person-focused feedback--e.g. "you are a strong leader" versus performance-focused feedback--e.g. "you led that meeting effectively" tends to decrease performance
• Self-generated feedback is more effective than feedback which is unsolicited
• Learning feedback is more effective than versus performance feedback--e.g. "what did I do well?" versus "how did I do?"
• We are taught that specific, behaviorally descriptive and timely feedback is best. Actually, the research refutes that. Feedback needs to include the impact the behavior is having on the provider in order to be effective and it needs to be delivered when the recipient can apply it, not necessarily when the behavior happens.

Relevance of advice in coaching:
If the goal is short-term and specific--e.g. deliver one great presentation--it's ok to structure and script and tell the person what to do and not to do. If the goal is long-term and broad--e.g. learn to customize presentations for a variety of audiences and adapt your delivery--better to ask questions to draw out the client's thinking. (Give them a fish versus teach them to fish.)

Goal-setting:

• Challenging, specific goals may inhibit learning. Start small and build confidence.
• Self-initiated goals are not as motivating as goals that stem from ample feedback from people who count.

Potpourri:
"Taming the Abrasive Leader" by Laura Crawshaw (Google; she has a website)

Tons of notes on branding and intuition. Great exercise from the Seven Voices of Coaching that I will use with the Advanced Coach Training.

Met LOTS of people. My discussion on developing internal coaches was well attended and I have people following up with me already. I've signed up more coaching schools for my survey for the book. Yikes! I may have to write it.

Generated several new leads for our open positions via Hudson.

Vegas is exhausting. I'm down $45.

Permission to Simply Be

Hello All,
I shared this with Jackie relative to her own forthcoming milestone and even this recent achievement of building our team and strenghtening the coaching culture in the firm - what an accomplishment!!! She suggested I post for all so here it is. It is a helpful reminder for us and for our clients - once the NPs achieve the career and life milsetone of Partnership there may be a period of feeling down or lost. I've described it in the past as a mourning period - the loss of 'striving' for a major goal. Some people miss that and feel a bit empty as a result. So while an accomplishment feels great then what does one's mind do next? This encourages reflection and acceptance of a quiet mind.

http://www.dailyom.com/cgi-bin/display/printerfriendly.cgi?articleid=29791

-Dawn

Pretty quiet out here

I suspect no activity on the blog means you are all heads down into your work. Hope you are having fun! I know you are doing good work for the firm.

I've been asked to lead a discussion group at the end of this month at the ICF conference in Vegas on "developing internal coaches". I'm trying to prepare an outline and some questions. If you had to point to three things that contributed most to your development as a coach, what would they be?

(Now's the time to hear from those of you who committed to posting regularly. Behavior change is hard, isn't it? Remember that when you work with your clients!)

The Name Game - Players Needed

After 3 days of transition time with Jackie, I realized in my excitement of trying to fill my mind with so much content, I had not covered a basic question - how will I introduce myself? what title will I put on my business card?

Because Jackie and I had been immersed in the global coaching space during our time together I noticed Jackie's Asia Pac "counterpart" (no one is really her counterpart globally - she is in a league of her own) calls herself the Asia-Pac Coaching Leader. This title has a nice ring to it, yes?? Asia-Pac has taken so many pages (perhaps all pages) out of Jackie's coaching playbook, this was one play it made sense for us to steal.

Jackie Bayer, America's Coaching Leader.

This title speaks to the legacy Jackie is building and the thought leadership she provides everyday. This title is Jackie's brand, no doubt. When I inherit this title, I will always be reminded of the big shoes I am filling (in Jackie's case, white go-go boots - who knew she was a lead dancer in a band??)

So this begs the question: If Jackie is the America's Coaching Leader, can we be the America's Coaching Team (ACT) ? It's a leading question on my part, I know. I like that it is simple and crisp and I like that I can easily recall the acronym. I like that it names us as a team (I know there has been great conversation around us as a "group" or a "team").

OK - I admit it. I just broke the rules of every leadership transition book I have ever read- I am advised to sit back and watch - don't make any big moves too soon - I just can't help myself. Having said this, please know that I genuinely appreciate that you have already played the name game and perhaps are very attached to the Professional Coaching Group, "PCG" name. So if nothing else, this is a good test for our brand, our identity and a great education for me.

Here is my ask. Share (POST) your uncensored reaction. I believe this dialogue will help us all articulate what's in a name and appreciate the strength of our brand - no matter where we land. Thank you for playing.

Inspiration

This morning I was in need of a little inspiration. My alarm went off at 6am after a sleepless night spent with a teething cranky toddler and a puking dog. So I lay there and I thought about a couple of things I read/saw yesterday that were very moving.

One was a letter to all Canadians from one of our political leaders who just passed away after a shockingly short battle with cancer:
http://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/story/2011/08/22/pol-layton-last-letter.html

The other was a video clip that was sent to me from my Korean adoptive moms group:
http://www.flixxy.com/korea-talent-choi-sung-bong.htm

I thought about how a feeling of purpose makes anything possible and allows people to persevere through hardship. It reminded me of one of my favourite quotes:
"This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap; the being a force of Nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy." — George Bernard Shaw

So Jack, Choi and George hauled my butt out of bed, less tired and more joyful.

Which brush?

From Jim:

We are all artists...are we choosing our brushes intentionally?

Last week as I was preparing for an initial conversation for a new client. I had interviewed a number of people to get perspective prior to the meeting. I thought I had a name for our issue and of course since I hadn't spoke with my client I was wrong. Based on the feedback from those I interviewed I thought some of the concepts from Gallwey's "The Inner Game of Work" might make sense, so I dove back into the book. He certainly emphasizes the power of questions. As I was reading the book I was reminded of the Mineral Rights model from Fierce Conversations. As a result, I went into the conversation with an open mind and desire to use the Mineral Rights framework. As I walked through the model I was reminded how powerful some of the questions I learned from Fierce are, such as, "What if nothing changes and we are sitting here in six months talking about this issue, how does that make you feel?", "Where are your fingerprints on this issue?", "What does ideal look like?", and "How can you best close this gap?".

My learning from this experience was this...I have learned how to paint with many brushes over the years, I need to remember that I have many brushes in the jar and not forget to look at all of them and choose intentionally as I begin to paint.

This is real

I'm meeting this week in Seattle with Janice to choreograph the transition. Jim suggested she begin to join me on our bi-monthly check-ins. Other ideas?

I dreamed I was piloting a big boat last nite and the windshield was covered with closed blinds. Someone to my right was giving me directions and I slammed into the pier because I couldn't judge the distance. I promise I will open the blinds before I hand Janice the wheel!

follow up to musings

Seeing your comments to my airport musings made me a little embarrassed for "letting it all hang out", as we used to say in the 60's. I'm sure there are some of you who are more private who were shocked by my candor. But two things: 1) the purpose of this blog was to be open about our thoughts and feelings regarding this transition and 2) as you coach our retiring partners be aware that they may be having similar, powerful fears that they aren't articulating.

I was in the airport coming back from a meeting of the Executive Coaching Council for the Conference Board--a group of 22 multi-national companies that are on the leading edge of coaching practices. We are on the front edge of that edge! Altho I didn't create it alone, there is a lot to be proud of at EY. I contrast that to my post-retirement nightmares of doing Sudoku puzzles in my sweats while checking Facebook postings hoping for a virtual conversation.

It really helped to name my fear. I was afraid that when I left this amazing group of creative, caring and passionate people, I'd surrender those personal qualities with my laptop. Thanks for your thoughtful remarks. (I agree with Vera that Jim is one hell of a writer!) Having named the fear, it lost its grip. I won't stop being who I am. I'll just apply those things to a different "canvas". Might even be fun to see what's next!

Thank you. And don't believe for a minute that I'm done with the fear. :)

airport musings on Friday nite

There's an underlying sadness in my soul fed by the premature death of my sister, my dad, the challenge/gift of my granddaughter, Taylor, and the poignant loss of many important people in my life--most especially my mom. This sadness is pulled forward with any event that I anticipate as a loss. I have an irrational (?) fear of losing my brain (aka intellect, creativity, capacity for generativity) when I retire.

I'm becoming more aware of how the traits I value in myself are "in relation"--to you, to other colleagues. My fear, my sense of loss, is tied to losing this relationship.

I need coaching! Please don't say " we will keep in touch". Great intentions, grim reality. Coach me. Where will my inspiration come from? I fear being dry alone since I am so fertile in community.

Been a while...

Haven't kept my commitment to post regularly - it's not easy to remember to do and also to figure out which of the various emotions about the upcoming changes are fit for blogging. I'm mainly so excite for Jackie and thrilled about Janice that I'm not filled with angst in that regard. It's just typical change-related emotions that kick around for me when I consider how this time next year our 'practice' will look different. Makes me want to fill this year with opportunities to be together as a team - we'll have natural times we'll cross paths with upcoming training and events but I'm picturing a good long huddle (Seattle perhaps?) with a little bit of kumbaya and whole lotta strategy and idea sharing, or the other way around. : )

Hope everyone is well and wonder if anyone has anything similar bubble up for them. We're so busy with FY11 360s and FY12 meetings that I'm not halted by the change emotions just cognizant they are there.

Sidenote: I get a kick out of Jackie saying she doesn't like the PMDP process - then goes ahead and does it better and more thoroughly than anyone I've ever known! The converasations are meaningful and the feedback is valuable. Thanks Jackie for taking the time with each of us in that way.

A great leader is.....?

As many of our new partners are asking 'What makes a great leader', I thought we could ask ourselves the same question. So, my question to the group: "What 3 words come to mind when you think of a leader you want to emulate?" I'll start......courageous, unique and creative. Who's next??

Lean On Me...

...you know the song? 'Lean on me, when your not strong, and I'll be your strength I'll help you carry on.....for it won't be long til I'm gonna need somebody to lean on."
That's what comes to mind when I think of this team (and of the role Jackie has played for me and countless others for the 9 years I've known her). We are all always available to each other and that comfort is grand, even when we don't lean often.
Just feeling grateful about this team and a career that is so fulfilling.

Hold on, Let go, Take on

Decided to move this from a comment to a post and broaden the challenge to the team. Hudson uses a framework for transition called "hold on, let go, take on to move on." So here's the request--what do you have to hold on to, let go of, and take on to facilitate the transition from me to Janice?

Personally, I am aware of so many things and have had an avalanche of emotion in the last week regarding the topic. "Holding on" refers to core strengths, values and accomplishments to honor. Transitions are times when we can view our core strengths and CHOOSE what to carry forward. I want to hold on to my ability to vision, my creativity, productivity, interest in developing others and my commitment to making a difference. I also want to hold on to what I've accomplished at EY. A coach recently asked me what I needed to do to leave a legacy before May 2012. I told him that I was content with my current legacy and I am! I want to hold on to my relationships at EY--one of the things I am very afraid of losing. I want to let go of my crazy schedule, my alarm clock and most of my "big girl" clothes. Don't be surprised when you see me post EY if I am wearing boots and big earrings. I need to take on broader interests and skills. I want to let it be ok to not be perfect, to get messy with my art, to be a beginner again.

More to come.

Challenge

This topic is drifting a bit from our "help Jackie and Janice transition" agenda, but I'm hoping it will get some traffic going on the blog.

I got an email from Deb Griest today with a link to a TED video that promotes 30-day challenges. Listen to the video (6 minutes long) and respond here with what you will commit to for the next 30 days.

http://www.ted.com/talks/matt_cutts_try_something_new_for_30_days.html?utm_s
ource=newsletter_weekly_2011-07-06

I'm thinking it's a great way for me to start practicing retirement--a series of 30-day challenges. Somebody go first--I'm thinking about what I want to start with!

National role

I had a call this morning with a Lead DC who was commenting on Janice's transition. She said, "the team won't need managing; the biggest challenge will be managing up." She wasn't referring to Mike, but to the element of influencing necessary to the role. I've been in this position for so long and have many trusted relationships. Even tho Janice has strong relationships within the APT, she has always had a sub-area role. There's a different sphere of influence; new rules. I started thinking about the fact that most of you transitioned over the past year from sub-are to national.

What were your lessons learned that you would share with Janice?

Extraordinary

As I think about Janice's arrival and Jackie's transition ahead my mind jumps to the lively mini-discussion we had in Chicago about whether we consider ourselves a team or a group. You all might recall Jackie's position that we are technically a group because of our independent work capabilities and as I recall several others felt like a team because of the connectedness we feel and share through our combined work efforts.

I'll point to the material Carla shared as a reference for what I think the PCG has come to be as an extraordinary bunch of cool talented people. : ) She shared these 8 characteristics of Extraordinary Groups: compelling purpose, shared leadership, just-enough structure, full engagement, embracing differences, unexpected learning, strengthened relationships and great results. The definition of being extraordinary is that all "members, individually or collectively, achieve outstanding results and experience a profound shift in how they see the world."

Jackie has shaped our ability to become so extraordinary : ) and by all accounts is an extraordinary leader of everything she's led at EY. The characteristics she embodies exceed far beyond any one reference model - but I wanted to share it here as we welcome Janice to this team....or group. ; )

Of course we are self-named the PCG not PCT, and in truth it does not matter what we are called but what we've become as members who share the same mission and Leader in Jackie, soon Janice. The bond is strong and Janice is so genuinely and warmly respected and welcomed - I have no doubt we'll stay extraordinary!

Joining

When Janice and I first discussed her leading the team one of her major concerns was how the team would feel about her "moving in" after we'd already formed and accomplished as a team. I wasn't worried because of who you are (confirmed by all your welcoming comments to her) and because of who she is (a known, respected and liked quantity), but since the purpose of this blog is to be deliberate about transition, I'd like your thoughts. She's reached out to all of you to set up some 1:1 time, which is a great first step. What else can she do to enhance her membership to the team?

A Time to Celebrate!

I want to celebrate all of you!! What a gift to be part of this team. Welcome, Janice! Your world is about to change :)
Have a great long weekend!

From Barb - Welcome Janice!

Dear Janice -Welcome to the PCG! One thing you'll need to consider is how we're all going to continue having fun together? Jackie is ALL about FUN!!! We need a FUN transition plan!

from Vera, who is learning about blogging

quote from Richard Branson:

“There is no one to follow, there is nothing to copy.” Life is always fresh and new. We are always on the leading edge, and the successes of the future will not rely on old ways of doing things. Thinking outside the box, embracing change, innovating, taking risks — these are the hallmarks of success in all facets of life.


Read more: http://www.bnet.com/blog/entry-level/5-life-lessons-from-richard-branson/3634#ixzz1Qi05lYSS

last 10--is that like losing the last 10 pounds?

I titled the blog "last 10" referring to my last ten months at EY, but realize it sounds like the proverbial "hard-to-lose last ten pounds"! In a way it is a good analogy. It is a loss. It will have its ups and downs. It will be hard and we will have to be deliberate.

I haven't begun to think about what I need to "shed". To be honest, I don't know where to begin. I'm unconsciously competent at this stage and have been operating in this mode for so long, it's automatic. I've asked Janice to review old activity reports and start a list of questions, but all that seems so tactical. Is that all that goes into successful transition--the tactical--the WHAT I do? How much of the HOW do I try to pass on versus letting her find her own way there. I really mean it when I say that I don't want her to to replicate. I want her to create. So, how do I best help her do that?

Bayer-->Pons

Dawn has graciously agreed to wear the "DC Network leader" hat! Congratulations, Dawn! She will bring new energy and great leadership to that role. Public announcement forthcoming. Hush, for now!

Bayer-->Smith

Congratulations to Janice! So happy that she is my successor. She suggested I blog over the next ten months to capture our learning. Joint effort, my friends!